


I Want To Hold Your Hand

by deadlydecember1214



Series: The Losers Of ‘89 Were Here [5]
Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King, KING Stephen - Works
Genre: Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Idiots in Love, Lack of Communication, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-19
Updated: 2019-09-19
Packaged: 2020-10-21 13:22:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20694227
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deadlydecember1214/pseuds/deadlydecember1214
Summary: “Fine, what do I want? I want to be your boyfriend. I want to hold you hand, Lennon-McCartney style. I want to take you out on dates and cuddle with you and make out listening to shitty music in your room. I want to tell you you look cute and—“He was cut off by Eddie throwing himself at him, kissing him hard enough to send him back a step.





	I Want To Hold Your Hand

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by an idea of foulwitchqueen on Tumblr of how Richie would have asked Eddie to be his boyfriend. For anyone who isn't a Beatles fan, the Lennon-McCartney reference is to the Beatles' song, written by Lennon-McCartney, I Want To Hold Your Hand. It gives me heavy Reddie vibes... like Richie totally listens to it and thinks about how nice it would be to just hold Eddie's hand.

Eddie Kaspbrak was on cloud fucking nine.

For the first time he could remember in a while, he was actually grinning as he walked into school. Playing with one of the straps of his backpack, he felt his heart race in anticipation and he barely managed to get to his locker without getting lost. Spinning the combo this way and that nonsensically, he gathered his courage and glanced down the hall.

Several classrooms away, on the other side of the hall was _his_ locker. 

Richie Tozier’s locker.

Shaking his head and biting hard at his lip to stop from grinning like an asshole, Eddie turned away and tried to actually recall his combination. He wasn’t at all surprised that Richie wasn’t at school yet. It wasn’t uncommon for his… friend? He guessed? Whatever, it was normal for Richie to come crashing into class with only seconds to spare, sometimes still carrying his battered skateboard under his arm.

He wasn’t worried… He had only seen the boy in question an hour ago after all.

And it had been the best fucking weekend of his life, besides the sixteen hours he’d had to work between Saturday and Sunday, Eddie had hardly left his bedroom.

He felt his face warm, remembering the feeling of Richie’s hand on his cheek and his lips against his, the two of them tangled up of Eddie’s bed. All they’d done all weekend was make out and talk, laughing loudly when Eddie’s mom was at work and quietly when she wasn’t. On Saturday night, Eddie had even told his mom that Richie was spending the night and they’d giggled, setting up a bundle of blankets on his floor for when his mom checked in on them before bed.

Of course, Richie had slipped into bed with him seconds after she’d closed the door. He’d wrapped his arms around the other boy and their lips had met, playful and still exploratory.

He’d gone from spending pretty much ninety percent of his life wanting to kiss Richie Tozier to doing it so much his lips were starting to chap basically overnight and he was _not _complaining. They’d only bid each other goodbye that morning because Richie couldn’t show up to school in the same clothes he’d had on hanging out with Stan and Bill on Sunday while Eddie was working.

So, yes, it had definitely been the best fucking weekend of his life.

Finally getting his locker open, Eddie reached out and collected his geometry textbook but he couldn’t stop himself from casting one more glance down the hallway.

“Looking for someone?”

Jumping, Eddie nearly dropped his textbook and glared at Mike as he slipped around him, opening his locker right beside Eddie’s, “Jesus, Mike! Don’t scare me like that, asshole!”

Mike quirked an eyebrow, “I yelled at you from down the hall,” He gestured behind Eddie, “Figured you heard me.”

“Oh,” Eddie shifted, turning back to his locker and slamming the door shut, “I— I didn’t hear…”

Mike gave him a look and got his books out, “How was your weekend? You and Richie didn’t come to movie night at Bill’s on Saturday night so I didn’t see you.”

Eddie coughed, looking away and shrugging, “It was fine. I was just, uh, tired from work, you know, so I didn’t go. I have no idea why Richie didn’t show, I mean, besides that he’s a complete tool but, uh… what, uh, did you guys watch?”

Mike turned to look at Eddie, eyebrows drawing together, “Okay, psycho… It was Bill’s turn to pick so what do you think?”  


“Silence of the Lambs,” Eddie nodded, eyes darting distractedly over Mike’s shoulder. 

Mike looked back too before turning back to Eddie, “Okay, seriously, what is up with you?”

“Me?” Eddie asked, gaze snapping back to Mike’s as he shook his head, “Nothing. Nothing is up with me.”

“Fine,” Mike shook his head, closing his locker, “Well, I’m going to head to Lit but when you decide to tell me what’s up, you know I have free period during fifth. See you later, Eddie!”

Eddie smiled and waved to him, closing his eyes and cursing himself the second Mike’s back was turned. God, could he be anymore fucking obvious? Throwing his head back into his closed locker door once, he stood and sighed, looking down the hallway again.

His heart stopped.

Richie stood at his locker, forcing his skateboard in with one hand and jerking his economics textbook free with the other. As Eddie watched, he dropped the textbook on the ground and haphazardly slammed the locker shut. Smiling to himself and shaking his head, Eddie started toward him to help only to falter in his step halfway there.

Stevie Martin, a not unfortunate looking dark blonde Eddie recognized from his fourth period government class, had bounded up to Richie. She said something to him with a smirk before crouching down, almost getting on her damn knees in front of _his _—something?— to pick up the textbook. Licking her lips, she stood up slowly and Eddie watched as she let out a big laugh, reaching out and touching Richie’s arm as he laughed as well.

Scoffing, Eddie glanced away and shook his head, feeling like he’d been socked in the gut. All the excitement, all the anticipation he’d felt bubbling up in his chest a moment before was gone and all he felt now was like there was a lump in his throat. Coughing, his mind instantly went back to the weekend, _their_ weekend… Friday night…

_You’re not a joke to me… You’re not._

Richie had told him that just two days ago, hadn’t he? Like only forty-eight hours hours ago, right?

Well, maybe he wasn’t a joke to Richie, _maybe_ he wasn’t… but he could also see he wasn’t anything fucking serious either.

Picking up his feet again, Eddie took off toward class, not daring to so much as glance over as he passed Richie and Stevie. If he didn’t think it would make him late, he’d have gone around the entire fucking building just to avoid them, but unfortunately he couldn’t. He didn’t have time to cry or be upset about his own idiocy either.

“Eds! Hey, Eddie!” He heard Richie’s voice calling after him and ducked his head, looking at his white Keds as he picked up his pace, escaping two doors down into his geometry classroom.

* * *

Richie cocked his head to the side, confusedly watching Eddie slip into his first period class, “Huh…”

“What?” Stevie asked, following his gaze to look over her shoulder.

Richie blinked, having nearly forgotten Stevie’s existence after spotting Eddie, “Uh… Nothing, I just had a question to ask him…”

She nodded, fluffy blonde hair swinging, “So, I was thinking I could drop in on you next time you’re at work,” She shrugged, “My parents are always making me take my little brother to the arcade anyway and I just thought—“

“Sure, I don’t care,” Richie was only half paying attention, “Look, I gotta split. Econ’s like on the other side of the fucking school. Check you later, Stevs.”

Before she could bid him farewell, Richie took off after Eddie, coincidentally the very opposite of the best way to his economics class. Getting to the door, he peeked inside and found Eddie with his head down, bent over his textbook even with a whole minute left before the bell.

“Mr. Tozier?”

Richie looked around to see Ms. Allen giving him a unamused, pursed lip look, arms crossing over her chest, “If I remember correctly, I so very _sadly_ don’t have you this semester.”

Glancing over to Eddie, Richie felt his heart swoop to his feet at meeting his gaze for a fraction of a second before he looked back at Ms. Allen with a mocking smirk, “Wait, this isn’t Econ?”

Ms. Allen narrowed her eyes at him, warningly, “Mr. Tozier…”

“Right,” Richie sighed, pointing over his shoulder and backing out of the room, “My bad. Sorrybout that, Hilary!”

Before Ms. Allen could give him detention, he ducked out of the class and took off down the hall.

A couple hours later, he dropped his chemistry textbook beside Eddie’s and fell into the chair beside the other boy. He’d been waiting for what seemed like forever to be beside him again, talking to him again.

Grinning, he elbowed his best friend, “Hiya, Eddie Spaghetti.”

Eddie’s eyes flickered over to him before returning to his notes open before him, coolly and mildly saying, “Hey.”

It wasn’t exactly the greeting he’d been anticipating… then again, he supposed they had to keep this thing pretty quiet, didn’t they? So, it made sense that Eddie was probably just making sure not to act out of the ordinary, not call attention to the two of them. Still, he couldn’t stop himself from _accidentally _brushing his arm against Eddie’s in the most casual way possible.

Eddie shot him a look before purposely scooting his chair away, creating a gap between them.

Richie’s eyebrows came together and he was about to ask what the fuck Eddie’s problem was when Mr. Dawson started up, calling the class to attention. Eddie ignored Richie’s every attempt to whisper to him and only acknowledged his existence to flick away the notes that Richie kept trying to pass him.

Sitting back in his seat, Richie glowered. Eddie didn’t even fucking need to pay attention in his damn class. He’d taken it because it counted toward his honors diploma, not because he needed it. He was taking Advanced Chem in the afternoon with Ben; this content was practically elementary to him so why was he acting like he had to scribble down every fucking thing Dawson said?

When the bell rang, Eddie slammed his textbook shut and didn’t even give Richie a chance to talk to him before rushing out of the room.

Seriously, what was his fucking problem, Richie wondered, gathering his things more slowly and lazily. He stuck his pencil behind his ear and froze as a thought suddenly struck him.

_Jesus fuck, what if he changed his mind?_

Swallowing down his panic, Richie shook his head. No. No, Eddie couldn’t have changed his mind. The universe couldn’t be _that_ fucking twisted. Hell, Eddie was the one who fucking started this whole damn thing anyway, right? Sure, Richie had kissed Eddie first but only after Eddie had _said _that he liked Richie.

_Shit, but what if he meant like a friend?_

Uh, yeah, no. He thought back to the whole conversation from Friday night and shook his head, starting toward his next class. Eddie had not meant just like a friend. He’d meant more… he’d said that he _more than liked_ Richie and then they’d spent the better part of two days blowing off their friends to make out and snuggle. So, no. That wasn’t it, couldn’t be it.

At lunch, Eddie didn’t even stand in line with him while he got his food like he usually did and he didn’t sit beside him either. Richie fell into his usual chair, trying to get Eddie’s attention by sulking at him. Eddie pointedly ignored him, sitting between Bill and Mike on the other side of the table.

Bill ran a hand through his hair and looked around, “Anyone w—wanna come over to my house t—tonight? Stan and I are g—gonna st—study.”

“Billiam,” Richie started, sitting back with a sigh, “You know what people really mean when they say ‘study’ right? You sure you want to invite all of us to sit in on that show?”

“Beep beep, Richie,” Stan glowered, taking a drink from his water, “We’re working on the essay I have due for Lit. Mike already said he’d come.”

“Alone with you and Bill,” Richie quirked an eyebrow, “I’m sure he will.”

“Rich,” Beverly shot him a look, “Shut the fuck up.” Sighing, he put his hands up in surrender as the red head turned to her boyfriend, “What do you think, babe?”

Ben shrugged, looking over at Eddie, who hadn’t touched his food yet, “Eddie, you free? We can work on that atomic equation project for AP chem?”

Eddie shrugged, picking up a baby carrot, “Yeah, okay.”

“I’ll come,” Richie broke in suddenly.

The other Losers looked at him questioningly while Eddie finally met his eye only to shoot him an annoyed glower. Still, it was something. Stanley raised his eyebrows, “I thought you didn’t want to ‘sit in on the show’, Trashmouth.”

Richie shrugged, giving Eddie a pointed look back, “Well, everyone else is going so I might as fucking well, too.”

Mike glanced between the two on either side of him and hummed to himself thoughtfully.

* * *

After school, Eddie drove slowly to Bill’s, taking every detour and long way he could think of. He did not want to see Richie… It was embarrassing and he felt utterly humiliated. He was just so… 

He’d wanted it so badly. He’d wanted Richie, wanted them being a _them_, so badly it had been a constant ache in his chest basically since he was 11 years old. And now he just felt like an idiot for ever thinking anything could really happen between them. 

What had he even thought? That they’d be together forever? That he’d be the only person for Richie from now on? That Richie had wanted all the same things he did?

Yeah… he guessed he had but he’d been pretty fucking wrong, hadn’t he?

Maybe Richie did like him but Richie liked a lot of people and a lot of people liked Richie. He was fucking annoying but he was also so funny it made Eddie’s heart skip a beat. And in the last few years he had certainly grown into his looks, making him so handsome Eddie blushed sometimes just looking at him, then again Eddie had always thought he was cute but girls had started noticing as well.

Richie had already had three girlfriends, one of them even being pretty serious. They’d only broken up three months or so ago… what if Richie didn’t want something like that again?

What if he just wanted the making out and the fooling around in Eddie’s room? What if he just wanted the same old friend with just a few new extra benefits?

Because Eddie didn’t think that would be enough for him. Knew, actually, that it wouldn’t be, couldn’t be. Not anymore. Not when he’d tasted something more than that. 

Pulling into Bill’s driveway, Eddie was a little surprised he’d actually made it without going off the road seeing as he couldn’t completely remember the drive. Turning his car off, he narrowed his eyes on Bill’s porch and was relieved to see there was no skateboard leaning against the house yet. Richie wasn’t inside.

Eddie got out of the car with his backpack over one shoulder, shoving his keys in his pocket and walking between Mike’s truck and Bill’s Plymouth that Bill, Richie, Mike and Ben had all spent most of the previous summer getting operational. Eddie had been around too but maybe—mostly—because of the way his heart raced watching Richie covered in smudges of grease and oil, eyebrows scrunched in concentration as he worked.

Shaking his head to clear it, Eddie dashed up the steps and knocked twice before going on in.

Bill and Stan were on the couch in the living room, Mike on the floor by the coffee table when Eddie got inside. Bill glanced up and quirked a smiled, “Y—you know you don’t ha—have to knock Eddie.”

“Sorry for being courteous,” Eddie quipped with a half smile, setting himself down beside Mike on the floor and getting out his Advanced chemistry book and starting on the assignment while the others talked about Lit.

“But I don’t get it,” Stanley said, shaking his head and waving his book under Bill’s nose, “It’s one story, _one_, so why is Ms. Burke have us talk about it’s power as an anthology?”

Bill smiled at him, pushing the book down gently between them, “B—because _The Illustrated M-Man_ is an anth—th—thology, it’s just presented in the f—f—form of a single story.”

Stan stared at his boyfriend for a long moment before looking to Mike, “Did you get that?”

Mike shrugged and jerked his head in Eddie’s direction, “Ask the future valedictorian.”

“You don’t know I’ll get it. Monica Austin is only like a decimal point behind me and we still have three semesters until it’s announced,” Eddie warned, keeping his eyes on his homework.

“Monica Austin has the GPA she does because she takes softball classes,” Stan shook his head, “She’s never taken one step into an AP class or duel credit course. You deserve it. You’ll get it.”

Eddie bit back a smile and quietly highlighted a line from his notes before saying lightly, “It’s an anthology because it’s a series of stories but Bradbury purposefully wrote that all the stories exist in the same universe on the skin of the illustrated man himself. You could interpret it as Bradbury’s way of saying that we carry the stories of the world around with us everywhere we go.”

Stan and Mike stared at him for a moment before ducking simultaneously and scribbling in their notebooks.

A moment later, the door flew open and Eddie instinctually looked up to see Richie walking into the house backwards, arguing with Beverly as Ben followed the two looking exasperated.

“I never fucking said The Wall is better than The Dark Side of the Moon, Beverly, I just fucking said that Comfortably Numb is the best song on either of those albums,” Richie exclaimed.

“Fuck you, Tozier!” Beverly snapped in outrage, “Time is the best song out of everything on those two albums and if you say differently, you’re obviously kidding yourself! Fucking _Us And Them_ is better than Comfortably Numb!”

Mike broke in, calling out to Ben, “Hey, Ben, how are you doing?”

Beverly and Richie quieted and Ben grinned at Mike, “A little better now, actually.”

Spotting Eddie sitting on the carpet, Richie threw himself down next to him and nudged him with his shoulder, “Why you been ignoring me all day, Eds?”

“Don’t call me that, fuckhead,” Eddie looked up at the other Losers, all of which were paying some degree of attention to him, and then glared at Richie, “And I wasn’t. Everything isn’t about you, Trashmouth.”  


“Why are people always telling me that?” Richie asked before nudging Eddie again, “Come on, Eddie, I wanna talk to you.”

Shrugging, Eddie said, “Well, I’m going to work with Ben so I can’t—“

“You guys can talk,” Ben supplied after Beverly elbowed him hard in the ribs, “I think I got the first few equations.”

Rolling his eyes, Eddie shrugged, “Fine, whatever, I wanted water anyway.”

He got up and headed for the kitchen, Richie jumping up and following on his heels. Getting into the kitchen, the door slipped closed behind them and Eddie turned around, “What do you wa—“

He was cut off by Richie lips, one of which was still healing from being split open, on his. All his fight seemed to just evaporate and his arms came up out of instinct, slipping around Richie’s neck and pulling the taller boy closer without his brain even giving permission. Some voice in the back of his head was telling him that this was probably a bad idea. 

He was mad at Richie, wasn’t he?

And all the others were just one unlocked door away, weren’t they?

But the rest of his entire being wanted nothing more than to just melt into this and it was so fucking hard to fight that craving. He’d missed Richie like oxygen all day, missed doing _this_ with Richie. He hadn’t even let himself brush against the other boy and why? Because his ego was hurt? Was that why he’d been mad? Because he was honestly struggling to remember at the moment. 

Richie backed him into the counter of Bill’s kitchen and Eddie felt a small part of reality come back to him. He shouldn’t be doing this… He _couldn’t _be doing this!

With a small gasp, Eddie dropped his hands to Richie’s chest and pushed him away, choking out, “Are you fucking nuts?”

“Actually, a little bit,” Richie argued, “You wouldn’t fucking talk to me all day!”

Eddie rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest, “Oh, please, you seemed prefect happy with that bottle blonde, Stevie Nicks wannabe.”

Richie tried not to but ended up turning away to laugh. Eddie, on the other hand, was not amused, “It’s not fucking funny, Richie! And if you’re into her fine but we have to stop this, whatever this is, now because—_ Why the fuck are you laughing_?”

This just made Richie laugh harder and Eddie reached out to shove him away only for Richie to gently grab his arm and pull him closer, biting his lip until he had contained himself.

Looking down at Eddie, who was glaring at the zipper of Richie’s hoodie, he cleared his throat, “Look, I’m sorry.” He leaned in closer to meet Eddie’s sour gaze, “Eddie, I’m sorry for laughing, you’re right it’s not funny.”

Eddie tried again to push him away but Richie put an arm on either side of him, setting his hands on the counter to keep him in place, “Eds,” He dropped his voice quieter and drew Eddie’s attention begrudgingly back to him, “You’re right it’s not funny.”

Giving up on slipping away, Eddie fell back against the counter and crossed his arms over his chest again to try and put some space between them, “What do you want, Richie?”

“I told you, I just want to talk to you—“  


“No,” Eddie shook his head, running his hand down his face and looking at the floor, “What do you _want_? Like, with us? What do you want to happen between us because I don’t want to be just the friend that you fool around with when you’re fucking bored, okay? I’m not going to—”  


He was cut off but Richie kissing him again and this time Eddie managed to push him off right away, “Stop fucking doing that! I’m trying to talk to you, like you wanted!”

“But you’re saying shit that’s fucking stupid and I don’t want to hear it so,” Richie shrugged and Eddie looked at him unamused. Sighing, Richie shook his head, “Fine, what do I want? I want to be your boyfriend. I want to hold you hand, Lennon-McCartney style. I want to take you out on dates and cuddle with you and make out listening to shitty music in your room. I want to tell you you look cute and—“

He was cut off by Eddie throwing himself at him, kissing him hard enough to send him back a step. They kissed for a long moment before Eddie pulled away, dropping back down from his tip toes. Richie blinked, “Hey, you told me to stop fucking doing that—“  


“I know I did,” Eddie sighed, looking up at Richie through his eyelashes and nearly sending the other boy into cardiac arrest, “But I couldn’t help myself. You were saying shit that was fucking wonderful and I didn’t think I could hear anymore and not kiss you so,” He shrugged, biting his lip.

Reaching up, Eddie put his hands against the back of Richie’s neck, lightly playing with the feather soft curls right there at the nape, “I want that, too. All of that. I was just… I was scared you didn’t.”

“You had a moment, fine,” Richie smirked and shrugged, “I’ll forgive you. So… You’ll be my boyfriend, then?”

Eddie rolled his eyes, the expression on his face one of utter endearment, “Yes, asshole, now come here.”

Pulling him down, Eddie kissed Richie again, opening his mouth and allowing Richie immediate access to his tongue. His boyfriend groaned, reaching out to grip his hips. His boyfriend, Eddie smiled into the kiss, brushing his teeth over Richie’s un-split lip before pulling away.

Brushing his hands down Richie’s shoulders, Eddie mumbled, “They’ll be wondering what we’re doing.”

“Fucking let them,” Richie muttered, going back in to continue their kiss but Eddie gently placed his hand on his cheek to keep him back.

Reaching down, Eddie grabbed Richie’s hand and lightly kissed it before nodding to the kitchen door, “Come on, Trashmouth.”

Leading the way, Eddie dropped Richie’s hand as they slipped through the door. Taking his seat back on the floor, he shot Richie a half smile when he sat beside him, even closer than before.

“So, Eddie,” Mike asked, calling the boy’s attention, “Where’s that water you were getting?”

Bev, Ben and Bill all fought to hold back their laughter, burying their faces further in their books.

Eddie felt his face grow warm and he looked down at his notes, “I just, uh, forgot, I guess.”

“Well, you were pretty busy with Richie’s tongue halfway down your throat,” Stan stated in monotone, shrugging. That broke the others, sending them into hysterics. “Mazel tov, idiots.”

“How—?” Eddie gaped, looking at Richie who looked confused as well.

“You guys are so f—f—fucking loud!” Bill shook his head, stuttered worsened by his laughter.

Beverly giggled and nodded, “God, we heard like every word! But, I mean, fucking finally!”

“Yeah, congratulations on being the last two to figure out that you two should be dating,” Ben quipped, giving them both a genuine smile.

Mike reached over and clapped Eddie on the back, “I _knew_ something was up this morning!”


End file.
